OMG!
I am sitting here looking around my little apartment, piles of pillows and clothes strewn about, boxes and bags littering the nooks and cranies and even though I truly HATE moving, this is a huge step for me! I will be going to my sisters house in Denver and staying with her until things are settled with my Master, and then the move to His house! *shivers in anticipation*.
I never thought in a million years that this day would come, especially with Master. When I began this walk and accepted His collar, it was with the understanding that He and I could NEVER have RL together. All the heart aches and pitfalls that I have faced then have only made me stronger, more able to handle the reality that will soon be upon U/us. Do I believe I am ready for this? With Him, Yes! This RL move with Him is something my heart has prepared for from day one of my walk..my mind may not have been thinking along these lines but, my heart has ALWAYS said yes, and will continue to do so. I have loved Him for so long now that trying to find a replacement RL had been difficult, until Snark.
Snark has been the only other Dominant I know that I would have and had given myself to completely, loved without reserve. My love for Him rivaled that of my Master and it has been heart breaking for me to say good bye to Him, let Him go as my Dominant. Master knows this, accepts that for a while my heart is divided and is willing to help me overcome my struggles as far as Snark goes. Master accepts that Snark will always be a part of my life because of my feelings for Snark, but...He also knows that I am fully invested into Him and that no matter what my feelings for Snark are, my whole focus will be on Him, His needs and wants and desires, and O/our life together. Whatever may be in O/our future will be set by the journey He and I take, what W/we make of it and I am excited to begin this new step in O/our relationship. I expect it to be a lot of hard work, yet I know that it will all be worth it, the joy and love that W/we will have together will be the ultimate reward!
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